How do you judge a grocery cart? Take this quiz to find out!

Remember the hilarious movie “Date Night” when Claire (Tina Fey) and Phil (Steve Carrell) go out to a restaurant and analyze other couples’ actions, playing a game called, “What’s Their Story?” I have to confess something. I do this when I grocery shop. I examine the contents of people’s grocery carts, and make up possible scenarios to explain their choices.

This may sound judgmental, but I assure you, I am only doing it for entertainment. Even though I don’t mind it, grocery shopping can be boring. How about making it interesting by hatching up some ‘fish stories’ while buying your mackerel?

Grocery cart

What does this shopper have planned? photo by Shallow Reflections™

Take this quiz to see how you would judge the following grocery shoppers based on their cart contents.  Please choose only ONE answer

1. 17 half-gallons of Allen’s Coffee Brandy

  1. An alcoholic on a budget.
  2. Celebrating a special event with family and friends.
  3. Someone who likes to balance alcohol with caffeine to improve productivity. At work.

2. 55 boxes of Annie’s Organic Mac and Cheese

  1. She has quadruple coupons, and the store will end up paying her to take this cartload home.
  2. This is all the children will eat but at least it’s organic.
  3. The baby just ate the grocery list so she has no idea what else to buy.

3. Nothing but Lite and Low Fat products

  1. Hoping to deflate the midriff faster than you can say ‘Tom Brady was innocent.’
  2. Watches food commercials and believes them.
  3. Despite written warning, gulped McDonald’s hot coffee and permanently damaged taste buds.

4. Stick figure in workout clothes buying vitamins

  1. Health conscious and runs marathons.
  2. Has vitamin deficiencies due to genetic condition.
  3. Card carrying member of Dr. Oz Fan Club.

5. Box of Twinkies peaking through gigantic bundle of kale

  1. Closet junk food eater.
  2. Kale cancels effects of Twinkies.
  3. An underhanded kale hater added Twinkies to her cart while she was busy squeezing cantaloupes.

6. Frozen strawberry rhubarb pies

  1. There is an annual church pie sale coming up.
  2. Someone tried to make lemon meringue pies and had epic fail.
  3. All of the above.

7. 18 items in the ’14 item or less’ aisle

  1. Ruthless rule breaker
  2. Can’t count as had to drop out of school to support younger brothers and sisters.
  3. In a hurry to get home to have a sombrero (see number one).

8. More than 5 brands of cat foot

  1. Her cat Missy loves variety.
  2. Buying cat food to donate to animal shelter.
  3. Hopeless cat woman.

9. Fashion model buying celery and bottled water

  1. Really does eat but has an amazing metabolism.
  2. Needed one more ingredient for Waldorf Salad.
  3. She’s thirsty.

10. Woman in her 60’s stocking up on sanitary napkins

  1. She has a young daughter at home.
  2. She needs protection until her hysterectomy next month.
  3. She can’t bring herself to cave and buy depends.
11. Man with cart full of hungry man frozen dinners, a 12-pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon, and a Penthouse Magazine
  1. Wife has gone for the weekend and he is planning a marathon of his favorite treats.
  2. He’s had a temporary set back on and just needs a day or two to recover.
  3. This man hasn’t had a date in 13 years, and it’s not looking good any time soon.

How did you rate?

If you chose mostly ‘a’ for an answer, congratulate yourself. You are a master of the obvious with little imagination.

If you chose mostly ‘b’ you are empathetic, and give people the benefit of the doubt. Do plan to add Pepto Bismal to your shopping cart, because a steady diet of this attitude will make you prone to an upset stomach.

If you chose mostly ‘c’ then you are imaginative, creative and a bit snarky. In other words, I think we could be friends.

C’mon admit it. You’ve played this game too. What tales have you concocted?

Here’s the clip from “Date Night” just for fun. It features my favorite vegetable.



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16 thoughts on “How do you judge a grocery cart? Take this quiz to find out!

  1. Great. I check out a new blogger in the 15 minutes while I finish my healthy lunch and just before I head off to the grocery store. While there I will buy lovely fresh organic veggies, fruit , fish and 14 cans of the cheapest canned green beans I can find on the shelves without dents. People always look at me strangely; I know they are dying to ask. But they never do. They just look between me (late 50s and overweight) and the healthy stuff and the beans. (The beans are for my dog. They keep him full and happy for practically no calories.)

    Of course, now I’m paranoid about all those sanitary supplies I put in the cart…

    • I LOVE canned green beans, Elyse. They are so much better than frozen, and ‘fresh’ this time of year comes from Ecuador. I’m sure your dog is grateful you have invested in then…and without dents! I do invest in organic produce, too, mostly because it tastes so much better. As for the sanitary napkins, there is more than one conclusion someone can draw. Especially if they are nice and lack the snarky gene. 🙂 Thanks for stopping by.

  2. Well, Molly, I knew if I read long enough I’d recognize myself!
    #8 c: Hopeless cat woman. After having to have two of my three cats put down within one week, I swore I was done with cats. Once my one remaining cat was gone, that was it! No more cats for me!!! One glimpse of a sweet little half white / half gray kitten face and I was hooked. I’m now the proud mother of a 3 month old kitten , Lucky, (get it?) along with my three year old black cat, Smudge.
    #10 c: With my dyed hair and youthful looks, I pray the checkout person will believe I still need those gigantic packages of sanitary napkins for the “usual” reason – and not to keep moisture from running down my legs whenever I laugh, cough or sneeze. However, I think I see Depends in my future!

    • Haha! Notice I used the name ‘Missy’ in memory of one of your sweet departed cats. I think Lucky is adorable. If you hold it at two, I think there IS hope for you, Noreen. As for the napkins, there are still people out there who will pick ‘a’ or ‘b’ so not everyone is onto you. Yet. 🙂

  3. Whenever I’m stuck in the check out line, I look at my own cart and think, “I wonder what this looks like to the person behind me?” I think the best was the week I was stocking up on deals at Meijer: BOGO cat litter, hair color, and sanitary napkins. All necessities, all on sale the same week, all-around a pathetic cart 😉

    • Hahaha! Kate, that is priceless. I couldn’t have made that one up. Let’s see….. a hopeless cat woman, buying hair color for a ‘friend’ who still has estrogen. Thanks for the very funny comment.

  4. Fun! I guess I was mostly “a” the master of the obvious. I’ve often wondered if the check-out employees play this game. I’ve come through the line with some odd combinations myself!!

    • I won’t hold it against you that you picked ‘a’ Laurie, because you did read my blog and you even left a comment. Thank you so much for joining in the judging fun. I’ve had checkout employees comment on my purchases before, which I bet is against the company rules.

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