How to Properly Rot Five Common Fruits

Rumor has it that some people buy fruit and don’t eat it. It’s possible some people are eating Halloween candy that stores have been pushing since July. If I repeat this post periodically, trying in vain to get someone to read through it, just substitute Christmas, Valentine’s Day, or Easter for Halloween.

In other words, this advice is berry timeless.

Once fruit is in the home and uneaten, there is no other choice but to let it rot. After all, it would be a crime to throw it away during its prime.

Here’s what I know about rotting fruit so you can do it properly.

Bananas:  This is the easy one. Sit them out in the fruit bowl and depending on the heat and humidity, you can have blackened bananas in no time. This one is so common there are recipes that actually depend on rotten bananas, e.g. banana bread and muffins.
WARNING:  Do not cook with them if they have liquefied.

Oranges:  I find that if you pile them up you can have a gorgeous looking fruit bowl for weeks. No one is the wiser that underneath that façade exist ideal rotting conditions. Once you begin to smell acetone, however, it is time to don rubber gloves, dive in and chuck them into the compost pile.

Grapes:  I find this is one of the rare fruits that rots rather quickly in the refrigerator. Buy them on Saturday, store them in the climate controlled fruit drawer, and forget about them. By the next Saturday you can have clusters of mushy, moldy grapes. Maybe the fact that they were six weeks old by the time they started the trip from Chile to Maine has something to do with their hastened demise.

Cantaloupe:  This is one of nature’s most mysterious fruits. It is nearly impossible to determine if it is under-ripe, over-ripe or just ripe, If you notice some shriveling action with black streaks, sharpen up your shot put skills and fling this super fruit into the woods to fertilize the forest floor. And console yourself with a peanut butter cup.

Apples:  These smell so good even your nose doesn’t know they have rotted. I store my apples in the cool cellar, and they can last for a long time. By the time I remember that hidden peck of plenty, they are soft, brown and jellied (but not the good kind you put on toast).
WARNING:  Do not transport them in original paper bag since integrity of the bag could be compromised.

Before this topic deteriorates any further, I’ll ask readers what rotting tips can you share? What is your favorite Halloween candy? Do you count Skittles as one all of your daily fruits?

©2015, Stevens. All rights reserved.

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17 thoughts on “How to Properly Rot Five Common Fruits

  1. Haha! Well, of course I count skittles as fruit – skittles are non-rotting fruit! Problem solved! There is a British comedian who always had a joke about the evil of pears. He said that pears will sit there for weeks, too hard to eat, while you wait and wait for them to ripen. They wait, and wait, and wait. Then, one day, when you leave the room, they say, ‘Quick! Now! Ripen, ripen, ripen, die!’ And by the time you return to the room, they are a mouldy, mushy mess.

    • I’m glad you have seen the light on skittles as fruit Silly Mummy. And I totally can relate about the pears. I just threw one away last week that played out this exact same scenario. I am laughing out loud at the thought that they are evil. 🙂

  2. I don’t like to brag, as you know, but I’m pretty accomplished at throwing money down the drain by letting expensive produce rot, but thanks for these new helpful tips! And try this one–put a ripe peach in your purse because you didn’t have time to eat it at lunch and then somehow manage not to realize it’s in there for a couple days–which I did for three day while actually USING my purse every single day–and you’ll be delighted with the result. 🙂

  3. Hi 🙂 Visiting your blog from Midlife Bloggers on Facebook
    Definately agree you have shared some good ways to properly rot these 5 common fruits, thanks for sharing the info 🙂 Good to know! I guess I did not realize how easy it was to rot them lol

  4. Fruit left out in the open is not the only way to rot your fruit. I left half a lemon in a Ziplock bag in the fridge, hidden behind my stock of tonic water. I’d guess it’s been there two months. For the past week, every time I opened the fridge door, the most amazing smell wafted out and up my nose. I moved everything trying to figure it out, except of course, the six pack of tonic water. Twice. It wasn’t until I made myself a G&T that I discovered that half lemon…not completely white and green with mold. Very Christmasy. *grin*

    • I’m impressed with your creative fruit rotting skills, Blogdramedy. And I can see that having that G&T was very good for you in so many ways! Think of the continued rotting that could have gone on in your pristine refrigerator if you had not made yourself that delicious drink. I can only hope you had some lime that was still okay. Fa la la la la!

  5. I am shocked—SHOCKED—that this article made no mention at all of the fruit fly lives that are supported by degrading fruit. We consider our home to be a precious incubator for these little ones, most especially at this special time of the year. I have been a mother to millions.
    And aged Halloween/holiday/Valentines candy—no matter how old— will disappear in ten minutes when taken in to a work site!

    • Rotting fruit is definitely vital in the life cycle of the fruit fly. Did you notice I had rather large ones in my photo? Sort of looks like they just flew in from a nuclear waste site. I am glad you are doing your part to preserve these little reproductive wonders! Good idea about taking candy to work. If I have any left, I’ll consider it.

  6. I like to take a bag of clementines and put them in the ceramic bowl I decorated at the pottery shop a few years back. The sides are high, and when I put the bowl on the top of the refrigerator, it makes it easy to forget that I ever bought those little citrus orbs. After a sufficient amount of time has passed (we’re going to say five months), the clementines will be dry as gourds. You will also finally solve the mystery of the unexpected fruit flies.

    • Kate, don’t get me going on clementines. They sell them by the bushel! I am always confident we will eat them all, but guess what? They become fuel for the compost pile. I like your idea of turning them into gourds. Next summer I’m going to buy some and dry them for fall decorations. What a great Martha Stewarty idea and craft project I believe I could pull off.

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